The INFPC - INFP Connection

INFP/ENTJ moderated blog.
INFP's are the magical, transcendent beings you read about often in fiction...but only few have the privilege of actually befriending in reality...Like Unicorns.

It is not titles that honour men, but men that honour titles.”
― Niccolò Machiavelli

Asker Anonymous Asks:
i really feel like im an infp but ive never gotten it after taking one of the tests. am i just kidding myself? (i am only 15 so i guess that could be another factor?)
infpconnection infpconnection Said:

Yes totally, age does have an influence in what your decision making process is. Try not to pay attention to the “infp stereotype” or “infp profiles”

Personally, i feel like a person isn’t totally developed into their pattern of decision making until they are an adult or a young adult. That’s my opinion.

A lot of people ask us how you can know for sure what type you are. There is not a way to know for sure anything that is related to personality typing. A lot of it is about how honest you are with yourself and some of it does relate to how you feel you fit the profiles and functions but it is not all determined upon what type you “think you are”.
The best way to tell is to study the material. Read up on the types you get whenever you test, read up on functions and MBTI and anything you can get your hands on.

As a young girl I was typed from age 16 to 18 as an INFJ.  I retyped (professionally tested) in college as an INFP. I don’t know if  something changed in my personality but I do know that I made decisions differently after I experienced certain traumas and events in my life.

I think it’s really all about that and not about your official “type”. Brit and I both believe that things change, people change, and everyone is unique. Personality grows and changes with us….The functions are the way you dominantly think or make decisions, doesn’t mean you can’t think/decide differently, just means you usually think/decide _________ way.

hope that helped???


Asker Anonymous Asks:
On the other hand, previous anon, you could also be Aromantic and generally doesn't have much to deal with your type, I wouldn't think
infpconnection infpconnection Said:

Could be? Maybe they aren’t aware of that possibility, Thanks for your opinion!

Asker Anonymous Asks:
hi, i'm an infp and i'm pretty much the classic stereotype, except for one thing: i am not romantic. not even a little bit. BUT i think it's because i pour all of my love into my platonic relationships as well as my ambitions and whatnot, so i've always viewed romance as a distraction from my other passions. does this make me a super-infp or is this just a little bit of t coming through?
infpconnection infpconnection Said:

Lol, well you must be an INTP then right?

just kidding :P

I know a couple of “types” that don’t seem to be at all their “type” remember that functions come before MBTI. The INFP “stereotype” is exactly that, a stereotype. One that I really don’t identify with.

I tend to appear more like an INFJ to others. Having many people “Type” me as that. And perhaps my functions lean that way. But I think we are all people, unique human beings… who can access any function at any time, it’s really just about the ones that are dominant that create our decision making and “personality traits” :)


Asker Anonymous Asks:
I am an INFP female in a relationship that is moving fast with an ENTJ male. We are having problems communicating because I will avoid conflict at any cost and need to be encouraged to express my opinion without feeling like it will be criticised whilst he avidly chooses debate (conflict to me) as a way of bouncing around ideas and getting his opinion across. Help?
infpconnection infpconnection Said:


Well as always this is just my opinion from my experience:
Perhaps try this, pick a choice time to speak about your problems / conflicts / opinions. ENTJs can deal with deadlines really well. Whenever I am feeling really pressured or upset with something but really do not want to talk about it -because i’m not wanting to emotionally vomit on people or feel nervous being put on the spot- I try to choose a time and a safe place to talk about those issues whenever I feel most comfortable. Like “Hey can we talk about this after dinner when we get home? I don’t want to share all this while we are at the table…I feel kind of overwhelmed and want to think it out…”

But let’s be honest, does that work with ENTJs all the time? no…..

Most ENTJs (especially extroverted NTJs) really like to poke and pry at people. It’s probably just something he enjoys doing…not meaning to be hurtful. Brittany used to drive me insane with her consistent questioning.

I will be honest, talking about things (whatever may be on the mind) pretty immediately with my ENTJ best friend is usually the best thing. She can handle my opinion and my emotions. ((((just a side note: My ESTJ mother is also a good person to have my thoughts aired out with. Sometimes for me, running it past someone else before approaching my ENTJ best friend (or in the past, my INTJ ex boyfriend) is the best thing ever. I can air out my emotions, get it straight exactly what to say and then approach the ENTJ.)))

But like I said, usually with ENTJs, honesty is the best thing. Just telling him “I am really intimidated by you because I am nervous to talk about _______ or share my opinion… etc…” or even: “I am feeling a little emotional and some what defensive, I don’t want to fight or overwhelm the conversation” before you start, could really help him understand where you’re coming from…

To stress this to everyone reading our blog that is either dating an xNTJ or in a friendship or has a family member who is an xNTJ (x meaning E or I)

Please explain to them what your thought process is. If you can simply explain to him “this is why I am doing what I am doing…” And be as thoroughly honest but not overwhelmingly emotional, you are saving yourself and HIM a lot of time and anguish….

Sometimes you just need to let them know “i am upset because of this, and i am dealing with it…. whenever i’m ready to talk it out, can we talk more then? i just need some time to deal the emotions of it…”

Most xNTJs just want to know “what the problem is” they can deal with the emotional side of things once they understand what exactly is the issue…Sort of like once they get a “diagnostic” report of why you are feeling the way you are feeling, they can better understand, tolerate, and love your emotional side. This worked really well with my INTJ ex, he was consistently pestering me about “what was wrong” whenever I finally learned to say “I am ________ and I am just trying to deal with my feelings that are overwhelming me about it…ETC” He was instantaneously softer and kinder to me, and usually helped me work it out within hours.
Try not to avoid conflict with any xNTJ unless you feel it is absolutely crucial…They really can’t stand it whenever you hide things from them like this. They want you to be vocal about what you think about their opinions. They want the problem to be solved, they want YOU to feel better and “be” better (and of course themselves) and they definitely don’t want to waste any time at all wondering what is going on with you or with your relationship (whatever type it may be.)

I hope this helped a little?

I know my thoughts were all over the place, it’s been kind of a rough day and I actually dealt with this today with my ESTJ mother and my ENTJ best friend!

If you want to expand your question or if I totally missed the mark I am so sorry, just send me another!

I’m trying to respond to some heavier questions while i’m at my desk tonight!



For my INFP brothers and sisters - stay fab.;)

Victor-Corpse Bride/Jane-Pride and Prejudice/Howl-Howl’s Moving Castle/Calvin-Calvin and Hobbes/Amélie-Le Fabuleux Destin D’Amélie Poulain/Roy-The Fall/Beth-Little Women/Sybil-Downton Abbey/Alice-Alice in Wonderland/Christina-Moulin Rouge/Belle-Beauty and the Beast/Frodo-Lord of the rings/Zuko-Avatar/Tauriel - The Hobbit/Nightcrawler-X-men/Luna - Harry Potter/Jane - Jane Eyre/Fanny-Mansfield Park/Rose-Titanic

LOVE! - Suzannah

“Why are there trees I never walk under but large and melodious thoughts descend upon me?”
― Walt Whitman

I Live My Life
Rainer Maria Rilke

I live my life in widening rings
which spread over earth and sky.
I may not ever complete the last one,
but that is what I will try.

I circle around God’s primordial tower,
and I circle ten thousand years long;
And I still don’t know if I’m a falcon,
a storm, or an unfinished song.

Rainer Maria Rilke, 1875-1926, is considered the greatest lyric poet of modern Germany. A self-described ‘wanderer,’ he was greatly influenced by his travels and friendship with the famous sculptor Rodin who helped to shape Rilke’s approach to ‘creativity.’


The Writers’ Retreat

For the July 20 NY Times Book Review. Thanks to AD Nicholas Blechman and editor Pamela Paul!

(via thecollegecollage)


Dominant (Ne) - Extrapolates ideas across contexts, constantly innovating, compares dissimilar things.

Auxiliary (Fi) - Able to influence others, motivated by feelings about people, conveys passion.

Tertiary (Te) - Making simple charts, diagrams, and lists; sometimes being blunt or tactless.


Dominant (Te) - Telling others what to do, directing and organizing people, making plans for groups.

Auxiliary (Ni) - Awareness of what their overall goal is, having an idea of how the future will be.

Tertiary (Se) - Engaging in physical activity every now and then, uses force of will…